[Humor] Relatives and their perceptions in India and outside India

Mother-in-law
In India: A woman capable of making your life miserable.

Outside India: A woman you never fight with, because where else you will find such a dedicated baby sitter for free?


Husband

In India: A boring human species, who listens more to his mother than you, and orders you around to serve him, his parents and siblings.

Outside India: Still boring, but now a useful human species that comes in handy when the house needs to be vacuumed.


Friends

In India: A person whose house you can drop into any time of the day or night and you'll always be welcome.

Outside India: A person whom you have to call first to check and make sure he is not busy.


Wife

In India: A woman who gives you your underwear and towel when you go to take a shower and also cooks for you.

Outside India: A woman who yells at you not to leave tub dirty when you go to take bath.


Son

In India: A teenager, who without asking will carry your grocery bags from the market.

Outside India: A teenager, who suddenly remembers he has lot of homework when you start mowing the lawn.


Daughter

In India: A lovely doll, who brings tears to your eyes during her marriage.

Outside India: A lovely doll, who brings you to tears long before her marriage.


Father

In India: A person you are afraid of, and who is never to be disobeyed.

Outside India: A person to whom you pretend to obey, after all he is the one paying your college tuition.


Doctor

In India: A respectable person with OK income.

Outside India: A money making machine, who has a money spending machine at home called 'doctor's wife'.


Bhangra

In India: A vigorous Punjabi festival dance.

Outside India: A dance you do, when you don't know how to dance.


Software Engineer

In India: A high-tech guy, always tries to speak in english in an American accent, always anxious to queue in the consulate visa line.

Outside India: The same hi-tech guy, who does Ganapati Puja everyday, and says 'This is my last year in the US' every year.


A Green Card holder bachelor

In India: The guy can't speak Hindi, parents of good looking girls are dying to hook him, wears jacket in summer, says he has a BMW back there.

Outside India: The guy can't speak proper English, wears jacket all the time, works in a Candy store at Manhattan, dreams of owning a BMW.